Searching......

I still search for a reason, something to tell why it was us this happen to. I never seem to find one and I don't think I ever will. I try to understand that things just happen and there isn't a always a reason but it feels impossible to find peace in that. Everyday I think about him, everyday he crosses my mind. I still have so many "why's"  that will never be answered and every milestone that will never be crossed. I still find so much anger in my heart and so much pain in my words.

I find so many pregnancy announcements in my news feed, none of which are mine. My heart is still so broken and hurt.

I search for sign of him in everyday things but there is nothing. I pray for peace but I just can't seem to find it.

Everyday I debate whether I should give up on my dreams or continue to weather these storms.